Once again I feel like I’ve neglected my child for months. So much happened at the end of last year that I decided to embrace the present and ignore technology (okay that’s a lie, but I haven’t sat down at MY actual computer in months). My apologies once again, life has slowed down and will for the next couple months so expect something I’ve promised time and time again; frequent updates of what is going on in the life of Ale. So get ready AA-er’s. It’s happening, whether you’ve been eagerly waiting for this or not.
So now that we are officially into 2016, I decided to write about what everyone does: NEW YEAR NEW ME!
What will I aspire to accomplish this year that will evidently go unnoticed in a month?
Ah, my apologies, I am seeing the glass half empty. Let me start over.
In 2016, I am trying to actually hold myself to one resolution that has been weighing heavy on my heart. I’ve told many of my close friends about what I plan on doing and even though some say it’s what makes me “me”, I have to truly invest in this.
My resolution this year will be to care less.
Please let me explain.
I am a person that has always prided myself on the fact that I try to keep relationships when I feel strongly about them. I care so much about the people in my life. I also love meeting new people. Connections with humans is something unlike anything else. An addiction of some sort. I am such a people person, to me being surrounded by people gives me a rush.
Finding someone with similar interests or a connection of any sort I am drawn to them like a magnet. I get so excited to have conversations and memories with people that I sometimes feel I care a little too much. And in the end I get hurt.
I decided this year to not let that happen anymore. I am going to invest in the friendships and relationships that invest in me. I decided to not make myself sick over people who I know wouldn’t do the same for me.
As sad as this makes me to possibly lose friendships that I’ve had for YEARS, it needs to happen. Over the years the connection has dwindled. The urgency for one another and curiosity of each others personal lives has become superficial. There are only so many times I can text saying “I miss you! How are you?!” with crickets on the other end.
So it stops there. I have vented too many times about being let down by people that I need to stop letting it bring me down.
Over the past year, I have rekindled friendships I’ve missed and it has been so refreshing. This made me realize that being attached to friendships I had put on a pedestal for so long, may not be the healthiest for me emotionally.
So I am asking friends, family, whomever is in my life, to hold me to this. If I call you about how so and so did this and have the same conversation we’ve had before, remind of this. Tell me to let the relationship die, pick up the pieces and move on, you have so many other people in your life that care. Invest in them, drop the rest. (You can quote this exact phrase if you’d like, I support it).
I am not vowing to be a cold-hearted bitch, or stop caring completely, but I will care LESS about somethings and MORE about others.
I am so happy to be surrounded by some of the raddest, most caring, eccentric, bishes in the world that this resolution doesn’t seem unachievable.
Cheers to 2016 AA-ers, let’s vow to keep the best people in our lives and say peace out to the rest.